Thursday Thoughts: When Hope Turns to Resolve
Inspiration, Motivation, Life Moments, Dealing with Alopecia or Loss
In August it will be a year since my dear friend passed away due to illness from a cancer diagnosis she fought valiantly. She would be perhaps a bit mad with me for saying she ‘fought’ the disease because she didn’t want the disease to define her life, but the factual truth is that her body couldn’t resolve the issue occurring in her cells even though her mind resolved the condition as she lived every moment of every day in a positive, uplifting manner.
As I biked today with only a small amount of regrown hair blowing in the breeze since my alopecia has reversed course again and tamed the new FDA drugs giving hope to me and thousands battling the disease, I realized I was resolved with my current condition.
I had such high hopes six months ago when I saw short white hair growing on my 4-year bald head. Could this be the miracle I’ve been looking for? Could it be my friend acting as a “hairy godmother” since my hair started growing after her passing? I believed it. It worked for ten months. My eyebrows and eyelashes were back. My husband called me Fuzzy as he rubbed my head. I was so hopeful.
Hope is such an important condition in life. In Wikipedia the definition of hope is so touching, “Hope is an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one’s life or the world at large.” But if you are human, you know that hope can lead to the potential for something to not work out. Defeat is a chance you take when you hope for anything.
I wish my friend was here to have the discussion on hope and resolve because I believe she would appreciate my terminology changing from one fighting to beat a disease to one of resolving to live life anyway when hope is dashed. Feeling the wind in the few hairs left on my head makes me believe that someday there will be another medication or change in my life that will bring back my thick brown hair, but until then I resolve to live my life with as much joy as I can until that happens, just like my friend did.
I am not succumbing or giving up, I’m just learning to live with my real, current condition the best I can with insight, humor, and blessings for all the other wonderous parts of my life. Shouldn’t we all?
Wednesday Wisdom: Ask For What You Want
Wednesday Motivation, Inspiration for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners, Small Businesses
“You never know if you can actually do something against all odds until you actually do it,” said Abby Wambach, a native of Rochester, NY and American retired soccer player, coach, and member of the National Soccer Hall of Fame who is the highest all-time goal scorer for the national team and second in international goals for both female and male soccer players with 184 goals.
When I heard my story was accepted into the popular Chicken Soup for the Soul’s latest edition, “Get Out of Your Comfort Zone,” I had to proof the story and the quote the publisher randomly chose to headline my story. They chose a quote by Rocky – the film persona played by Sylvester Stallone. I wrote back saying, “Since this is a story of a real-life woman trying sports, why can’t we have a quote from a real-life female athlete instead?” They responded positively so I chose Abby Wambach because of her Upstate New York ties and success.
I love my husband but one of our key differences is that I always ask for what I want and he doesn’t when it comes to many areas in life. I believe we should be able to ask for what we want – a better table at a restaurant, borrowing something from a friend, and sometimes not letting someone get in front of the car while driving. I know, I might sound selfish, but I feel if you don’t ask for what you want, you can’t possibly get it.
This theory combined with my desire to always represent women first over men, led to the quote change in a book where my name will be attached to it forever. If I represent women in business, sports, equality, and life issues all the time, it only makes sense I ensure the right quote for my story. The worse the publishers could have done was to decline but they didn’t. The lesson is pretty clear, if you want something, you have to ask for it and be prepared for the answer whichever way it goes.
Today’s Wednesday Wisdom reminds you that you have a voice, opinion, feeling, or belief that matters. You can choose to use it or deny it whenever you want. Make sure what you say or do is in line with your personal or business beliefs and carry through. We have many opportunities to state our opinion or get what we desire. Remember if the answer doesn’t go your way, find another solution, and remember you’ll have another chance someday.
Cheers to all of you standing up for yourselves and what you believe in and making sure you are representing your personal and professional brand as often as you can.
Friday Feelings, PR, Marketing Tips for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners, Entrepreneurs
If there is anything I’ve learned over the past 30 years in entrepreneurship is that the woman who starts her own business must be willing to promote, publicize, and market herself without having narcissistic feelings about doing so. Gaining free marketing in the form of written articles, stories, press releases, and media attention are excellent ways for a new person in business with a limited budget to get their name and brand known. And, if they are good at it, the more publicity you gain, the more publicity opportunities come your way.
In preparing for a speech I was giving, I took a look at my own writing and publicity past to illustrate what I’m saying and how simply beginning to write and market yourself can help you excel in the media. Here is my personal trail of PR successes and how writing led to publicity, which led to more publicity:
- Had a poem published in elementary school in a national book
- Photographer for school yearbooks in Jr and Sr. Highschool
- Became an entrepreneur and learned how to write press releases to promote events
- Asked the Syracuse Post Standard to become a columnist which I eventually did for 11 years
- Submitted stories to Chicken Soup for the Soul
- Submitted stories to magazines through HARO (Help-A-Reporter-Out)’
- These led to being the first business blogger for the new Dear Abby – “Dear Amy” for six months
- Started blog in 2008 – Have been a blogger for 15 years
- Wrote and published my first book in 2019 called “Under the Rose-Colored Hat”
- Contributor to other books in 2021 – Unfettered Hearts: “Our Beauty Lies Within”
- Contribute regularly as a source for 55+ Magazine and Oswego County Magazine
- Writing popularity led to radio and television appearances due to my brand.
Becoming a writer was never part of my business plan written in 1995, long before social media was even a marketing source, so free advertising has been worth thousands of dollars and built my resume for speaking. It can be the same for you.
Suggestions for you to become a writer, speaker, and better PR agent for your own company:
- Look at your background of written work – what does it comprise?
- Did you write in high school, college, post-college, in professional organizations
- Do you have information you can reuse on a blog?
- If you have social media marketing channels, you can share anything you write or get published for on social media marketing channels increasing your publicity and brand image.
- Write in an industry magazine or contribute to an industry blog – ask about it!
- Take past public speaking scripts and use them for marketing content.
- Sign up for writing classes
- Subscribe/Follow websites like
Chicken Soup for the Soul – Chicken Soup for the Soul
H.A.R.O. – Help A Reporter Out – Help A Reporter | About | Help A Reporter
On Linked In – Linked In Job Alerts – Freelance Writing – Daily Notifications Search all Jobs | LinkedIn
All I can tell you is that you have all you need to help your own brand by becoming an active writer, blogger, contributor to local news, and PR specialist, more than you know. I hope you start today with a plan to begin and prosper like I have for decades.
Wednesday Wisdom: Passages
Wednesday Morning, Inspiration, Motivation for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners
After ending a week of meetings with dear women associated with my business and life, the word passage kept coming up in my thoughts after visiting each one.
The first meeting was with a woman who physically moved away but calls me when she is in town so we have lunch and talk about what has happened during the passage of time since we last met.
Two of the other women attended an event where we haven’t been physically in each other’s presence since Covid struck in 2019. We saw each other online but haven’t hugged or met face-to-face. We wondered how the passage of time from 2019 to 2023 had gone so fast and changed so many ways people relate to each other especially being more nervous to socialize.
The other two women were my 86- and 89-year-old aunts – one still living in her home for the last 8 decades, and the other at a nursing home for the past year. They reminisced about memories and how content they were letting time slip away and letting go while aging. They reminded me losing my hair eventually won’t matter as much to me since all women age and lose parts of themselves in the process.
As I face the passage of being a woman entrepreneur for 3 decades – most likely ending my business journey at the end of the year – thoughts of whom I’ve known, what I’ve learned, what I’ve taught, and even what I’ve written swirl like a kaleidoscope of colors (mostly shades of pink), in my mind. Passing on…isn’t always a happy statement but when you look up the definition of the word in a dictionary it states, “Passage is the action or process of passing from one place, condition, or stage to another.”
The definition of passage doesn’t mention if the action or process is good or bad, happy or sad, relevant or irrelevant, just that it means moving from one place, condition, or stage to something different. It has a much softer meaning than what we tend to think of. For example, if a loved one passes on we know they are psychically not here, they are just behind a thin veil where we can always reach them; if a business passes on (aka closes), it might mean its initial purpose has come to a natural end; and if our physical beauty passes on, we don’t lose our spirit just because we look different.
Today’s Wednesday Wisdom might spur on visions of what the word “passage” means in your life or business right now. Is the passage good or bad? Is it expected or unexpected? Have you learned anything from it? Can you reset to move onto another place, stage, or condition gracefully? If you’re feeling good and up for the challenge, awesome, and if you aren’t talk to someone to gain a clearer perspective or give yourself more time. The definition of the word passage didn’t have a time limit associated with it.
My only wish for you today is you are gentler with yourself as you lean into that next passage, stage, or condition you face, taking positive steps to continue to make your life or business a content place to be. Just sometimes, content is enough.
Where It All Began – June 2008
Monday Motivation for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners, and Small Businesses
In June 2008, after listening to a woman entrepreneur in Ithaca, New York inspire my audience of women business owners to start blogging, I was very interested and created my very first blog post on June 18, 2008.
In case you don’t remember in 2008, the United States economy faced the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression, Barack Obama was elected President of the United States, and Google released the first “public version” of the Chrome web browser. I was 3 years into running my second company to help women entrepreneurs and felt I could inspire and educate them through a new blog that could share my company’s message about women buying from women – especially during an economic downturn.
Women always ask me how I started writing and stayed loyal to a blog for 15 years and I say, “You just begin and be consistent and it will become second nature to you.” My blog still doesn’t have millions of followers but it is shared often and referred to by others, and personally, I love writing it.
So today I’m sharing the first simple blog I wrote to encourage you that it isn’t too late for you to begin a blog today. It remains a way women who love writing make money, share their passion, inspire and educate others, and help change the world through their words. Good luck!
JUNE 18, 2008
Women entrepreneurs all over the region are gearing up for three months of “summertime business.” It’s inevitable when you live in New York State, if you are the mother of college or school-aged children, or if your clients enjoy the warm temperatures, vacations, and carefree living they wait for all year long. Even though we aren’t school girls anymore, there is something magical about the first day of Summer when life becomes a little more relaxed. Lemonade, fireflies, and warm breezes sweep away the stress that drives us all year long.
Yet as businesswomen, we have to continue to work to keep our companies viable. We can’t afford a three-month summer vacation and expect to increase sales and gain market share at the same time. But we should remind ourselves that Central New York does business a little bit differently during the glorious summer months which can benefit us in many ways.
Sitting by the pool allows us the opportunity to relax and dream big about our company’s future. Sipping lemonade with some women we’ve met since January can lead to productive collaborative partnerships in the Fall. Reading up on new business trends and techniques can prepare us for better business practices when the leaves change.
So, embrace the first day of Summer and realize this particular time of the year can do wonders for your mind, body, and spirit which will eventually help to propel you and your business forward.
Wednesday Wisdom: You Have Innate Talents
Inspiration, Wednesday Morning, Motivation for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners
Have you ever heard the same compliment so many times that even if you didn’t believe it, finally you had to accept it? Has it ever occurred to you that a trait or talent you didn’t think you were born with, developed over years of either practice or use without you trying? I bet you can think of something specific.
This happened to me as a writer. I never intended to be a writer. I loved math and science. I was a logical thinker, very organized, and excelled in leadership and sports. Writing was not something I loved until I became an entrepreneur and needed writing skills to create press releases, communicate effectively with clients, form contracts, and eventually write this very newsletter to inspire women in business. I never took more than the standard writing courses in high school and college either. So, I finally determined my writing became a natural ability of mine.
Soon confidence in this skill led to writing a column for the Syracuse Post Standard for 11 years, which I and two other women pitched to them; and submissions to magazines and book series like Chicken Soup for the Soul, until I wrote my own book about my struggle and lessons from alopecia in 2019. “What me a writer?” I was still doubtful until I began submitting writing samples for some freelance work and have been slowly getting some business from it. Hmm, me a writer?
Sometimes in life and business, we must trust what others tell us. We must also take time to look at our past history and reconcile for ourselves that we are naturally talented in an area and then pursue it more. The degrees that hang on the walls or the awards on our bookshelves don’t always paint the complete attributes of our success, sometimes others tell us.
Today’s Wednesday Wisdom is to remind you to listen to consistent compliments in your area of expertise or in adjacent areas of work or duties that might be a signal to proceed more confidently in a new side direction to make money. I was never good at PR until I had to be for clients in my event planning business. What are you good at for your clients that you wouldn’t necessarily think in the beginning you were talented in? Lean into these extensions of yourself.
And if you need some pointers on writing and getting submitted into books like Chicken Soup for the Soul, join me in Rome, NY next Tuesday for a special event I’m giving to provide women with tips. You might, like me, be the next unexpected writer in your group. your life, take a moment to celebrate that amazing feeling and then share it with others to fill them with positive emotions.
Friday Feelings: Women Try New Sports Like Rugby
As I topped the tall hill, two flat playing fields (aka “pitches”) lay ready. Approaching the one with the two yellow goalposts on either end like the YouTube video I watched to prepare myself, I saw my cousin Paige, dressed in her former rugby cleats standing near an oblong football much bigger than a regular American football. I knew I was in the right spot to try rugby for the first time.
My first impression of rugby was at college when the men’s team would crazily be dancing around an Indian statue – their mascot of some sort – in a bar on a Friday night. My feeling was they weren’t crazy, but the sport they liked playing must be crazy because that is how they identified themselves as a team when games and practice weren’t in session. So, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect on a balmy May night on the “pitch” in Syracuse.
Like most of the team sports I’ve tried, practice started with simple passing and running drills. In the case of rugby where the ball is larger and is thrown in a unique spiral, getting my hands around it and trying it out was my first lesson. I wasn’t horrible at it since my father, a football coach, taught me how to throw a mean football spiral growing up. I could handle the throw and motion until the passing drills of running while throwing the ball in a timely order to teammates in a moving line sped up my work. And in rugby, the ball must be thrown behind or to your side, not in front, so timing is essential to get down.
Once the throws and simple running drills were done, we practiced running more advanced sequences of drills of passing and pocketing behind a teammate repeatedly until we hit the other side. If anyone dropped the ball, a “half-moon” exercise was given to the team. I definitely contributed to the half-moon workout which was basically a burpee plus a half-squat turn in both directions upon standing – thus the soreness in my thighs today.
After practicing the offensive drills, we turned to defensive drills learning the importance of working in a line to stop the offensive players from coming through. This is where my age and lack of quickness slowed me down. Running forward is one thing, trying to run as fast as the offensive line trying to catch up with them was another. Thank God their full-body tackling exercises were last week. When asked if anyone has gotten really hurt tackling without pads, I heard a few horror stories but not as many as you’d think. “Tracy, the old girls play just touch and not tackle,” a few of them told me. Yeah, that might be where I belong, I thought if I wanted to continue playing.
As the hazy sun started setting after two hours of a really fun time, they took me over to the “scrum machine” to give me a taste of what a scrum feels like. A scrum is a method of restarting play in rugby football that involves players packing closely together with their heads down and attempting to gain possession of the ball. With two teammates on my side, we maneuvered into the machine for the feeling and a photo opportunity. This is where I knew for sure you must have strong legs for rugby.
Playing along with a team of great girls reminded me why I love all women’s communities because bonds develop quickly and you want them to linger. So, I accepted their invitation to a restaurant across the pitch for food and drinks. It’s there I learned more about a few of the players and enjoyed the casual conversation. My cousin Paige said, “This happens after all rugby games – both teams coming together afterward to share in the experience and get to know each other.”
As I said goodbye to my rugby pals, they handed me my own rugby ball to keep for practice and invited me back anytime to play with them. I told them I would join cheering them on at a special fundraiser they host annually for a cancer patient called “Ruck Cancer,” and perhaps rejoin them for another great night of running, passing, scrumming, and bonding on and off the field.
Wednesday Wisdom: Core Traits for Success
Wednesday Wisdom, Inspiration, Motivation for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners, Women in Sports
I’ve always liked to be where the action happens. Whether that was trying out to be our sixth-grade class speaker, attempting to get my all-girls slate elected for our 9th-grade class, leading as women entrepreneurship was on the rise in the early 1990s, or even sitting on the tenth hole at a major golf tournament at 6 a.m. to be the closest one to the stars. Sometimes I wonder if loving action naturally meant a career in the event field.
Since losing all my hair four years ago, which changed the trajectory of my personal and professional career due to a natural interest in not wanting to be in front of a crowd, I must admit I miss it. Could it be something so ingrained in a person for fifty years isn’t easy to put to rest? If we believe we are born with God-given talents and a unique way to change the world for the better, then it makes sense we find resistance to changing our fundamental ways of being.
As my energy rose all day yesterday as I prepared to learn rugby for the first time with my cousin Paige, I knew having an event to attend in the afternoon, that I created, is the reason why I was so happy. Better yet, event days mean being with other women. Yesterday’s event was being with women I have never met and wondering all day what they’d think of a 58-year-old bald chick trying their sport.
By now you should recognize the name Michael Block if you watch any news -especially sporting news. Michael is an average PGA professional and golfer who works for a club in California but signed up to compete to win a spot at the PGA Championship this past weekend in Rochester. Guess what? By entering this name in the event, playing his “own game” amongst the best, he secured himself a top 15 win, the admiration of everyone watching this humble guy, and chances to play more elite golf – all because he signed up for an event, stayed in his lane, and believed something good might happen. Isn’t this what we all want?
Today’s Wednesday Wisdom is to inspire you to touch base with the core of who you are, what you love to do, what you think you were born to do, and what you still want to do at a higher level and lean into it more. Humans are not meant to be static in their lives, decisions, or opportunities. We are born to dream, do, and do again whether we succeed or fail. Believe you belong trying at a higher level too and look for other women (or men) who have achieved what you hope to achieve and follow suit.
I’ll keep planning sporting and business events for women as long as they attend because I don’t think it is something I am capable of letting go of….quite yet.
Monday Motivation: The Beauty of Michael Block and Five Lessons From His Run at the PGA Championship
I am mostly inspired by women and therefore write about them 99% of the time, but 1% of the time if a man inspires me in sports or business, I can’t help but share my thoughts on them too.
Lucky to be one of thousands of people at the gorgeous grounds of Oak Hill Country Club for the PGA Championship for two days, I witnessed the pure joy of a person playing the sport they love while strangers joyfully cheered him on. He wasn’t one of the leading men projected to claim the 2023 PGA Championship, but as a golf professional, he competed against other golf teachers and won his way into the annual tournament.
Michael Block, a hardworking everyday golf pro from California, had a chance to live his dream of playing alongside the greats of today’s game by giving himself a chance to enter and win and then performing spectacularly to make the cut on Friday and land a final twosome spot with global golfing icon Rory McIlroy. Even in his wildest dreams, Michael couldn’t imagine the four-day high of playing top golf in the limelight and hearts of millions.
So, what can any of us, average human beings, perhaps slightly above average in our professions do to be like Michael Block? Here are my insights:
* You must dream to get started! You can’t begin without a dream or goal.
* You must dream larger than you believe and then take the steps necessary to approach that dream every day. In Michael’s case, playing golf with joy and practice.
* You have to take risks or you’ll get nowhere. If Michael didn’t put himself into contention to win a spot to get into the PGA Championship as a golf professional, he wouldn’t have been there. Risk is always, always the biggest part of the reward.
* Be humble, yet confident in your abilities. Michael told numerous commentators he was winning because he was playing his game, not trying to be one of the golf stars on the field. He accepted who he was, and where he was, and played the way he believed he should play for himself.
* Be grateful to people – especially strangers – who cheer for you. People aren’t as bad as the media paints them out to be. Most people cheer for other people. There is so much less contention in average day America so thank anyone who opens a door for you, gives you a compliment, or cheers for you to win in life.
So, the next time you want to achieve something big, take these lessons from Michael Block’s PGA Championship experience and apply them, and watch yourself love your life while soaring higher than imagined as well.
Wednesday Wisdom: Meeting Face-to-Face
Wednesday Wisdom, Inspiration, Motivation for Women Entrepreneurs, Female Business Owners, Small Businesses
After traversing construction zones filled with parents visiting town for their college student’s graduation, I finally made it to a quaint coffee shop in Fayetteville to meet with one of my members. We hadn’t seen each other in person since the pandemic only via Zoom. What a lovely moment seeing and hugging her and sitting down for an iced chai tea.
An hour meeting turned into an hour-and-a-half meeting as we conversed about her business with so many ideas blooming now that Covid-19 was pretty much behind us. This 80-year-old entrepreneur was full of vim and vigor ready to continue her life work and entrepreneurial endeavors but needing some advice and feedback on her plans. She was so appreciative of my time and ideas, and I was equally grateful for being energized by a woman who doesn’t want to retire.
I know many of us have resumed our former ways of doing business prior to March 2020 but if you haven’t this inspiration today is for you. Zoom has its benefits like attending global or national events we simply can’t get to that easily. Keeping a distance if our health isn’t good, is another reason to stick to online meetings. But if you have just gotten too used to the convenience of online events, I encourage you to step out there again, and again, until you feel the warmth of another’s presence.
Technology is still an awesome way to connect to people far and away from where we work and play like keeping in touch with my running friends in different countries, but we can’t overuse it in exchange for social interaction. I noticed this when my nephew this weekend was exhilarated to attend his junior prom in person instead of skipping it like my niece had to do for hers because of Covid-19. We are on this planet to live, interact, rejoice, and revel in the company of others.
Today’s Wednesday Wisdom is to reinvigorate your need to meet others outside your company’s or home’s four walls. It is to remind you of the enjoyment of being surrounded by people with shared interests and passions. Today is the day to agree to go to a live event with people you haven’t seen in a while. Lose the trepidation, gain a new wind under your wings, walk out the door, and do something positive for yourself to get back into your past social enjoyment.
Of course, I plan events both sporting and business, in hopes that you will choose to see me in person again. I promise to give you a hug and advice and fill your day with some good-hearted fun and friendship. You never know what meeting with me will do for you, or what you will do for me.
Women TIES 