Thursday Thoughts: Self-Image Truths

Inspiration, Beauty, Self-Image, Alopecia Awareness Month

I was asked twice this week if I was a cancer survivor. It wasn’t based on any medical diagnosis I shared but rather on my appearance. Honestly, I don’t mind the question anymore because wrestling with a new self-image was essential for personal acceptance and recovery.

Explaining to others what it feels like to be bald, isn’t easy. I think one needs to experience it, to understand it. For people dealing with alopecia, baldness is an unpredictable occurrence that might not be reversed so accepting a new self-image is crucial to stepping out the door and facing the world again.

I’ve learned hoping for my hair to grow is an interesting concept.

I also think hope alone is interesting and so is hopelessness.

A person can feel hopeless but not have a negative or desperate outlook. Lacking hope for a change in my medical condition is honestly because I adapted and live contently with it. This mindset allows me to live in a state of “just being” not regretful, not only focused on the future, but just being here, now, and whole.

Acceptance of a situation doesn’t indicate the absence of wishful thoughts bubbling up periodically, because we are hopeful beings at heart. I’ve simply learned it is normal to wish upon a star for a change, but if the change we want doesn’t happen, we’ll live on.

The biggest takeaway for me being a bald woman for six years has been seeing my authentic self in the mirror – stripped of adornments, enhancements, adaptations, sparkles, and glitter. It has laid bare the core of who I am and what others still see in me more through my eyes, lips, and heart.

Experts say there are five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, disbelief, and acceptance. I believe those stages are true for someone facing alopecia, and even a person dealing with a loss of a limb, loss of youthful looks, and more.  Even if the reflection changes, the core of who we are doesn’t change.

Change can affect our mood, outlook, and experiences, but the center of who we are remains. Our essence remains. Embrace it, and you see your truth – your one true self-image. It’s internal, not external. It always has been, and always will be.